allmydreams's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- my apartment smells like crotch it's saturday, and i'm free, and i have nothing to do. everyone is hungover from last night...well, except me. that's because i was sober! hoorah for me. so i've done all this college-y shit since i've been back. last weekend i went to numerous parties, slept on a random couch, went camping, saw "the good girl", went shopping and bought a sexxxy thong and tank top from urban outfitters, got hit on by strange men, etc. this week i went to the dunshabe tea house with justin, saw "me without you" and had a breakdown with allison, went to school, ate lunch with rip and todd aka taaaaaaaaaaad a bunch, talked to a homeless man at penny lane, etc etc. last night i went to numerous parties (including my first ever frat party, where i ran into haley and stephanie hahaha), played asshole, and watched rip try to fondle laura by wrestling her. good news: i seem to have lost some weight since i got back here. bad news: even so, my stomach feels squishier than usual...perhaps this is due to the extreme pms i'm experiencing right now. wow. i was tempted to erase everything i just wrote, because really none of it mattered at all. here is how i am feeling, because that is probably more important and maybe slightly more interesting: i miss the dorms a bit. i miss cigarettes breaks with aj (who FINALLY fucking called me this morning), "one time at chey ho" moments, all the nerds in buck, getting trashed with laura in our room, that weird guy i randomly got stoned with sometimes...i dunno, just seeing random people all the time. apartments are so lonely, even when you live with three very entertaining people. i miss raf's apartment....i miss raf and alika and garrett (hopefully now that beebe's gone i'll actually see him). i miss platonic male friends and boys who were friends with my boyfriend and made fun of us. i miss shows. i miss jose. well i don't even know if i miss him, but i miss us. i miss going to sleep with him and pretty much just always having him there. i miss jason and i wish i could have that with him, damnit. i miss crushes. i don't have any right now, damnit. i especially miss crushworthy teachers like my asshole of a journalism prof last semester. i miss rip not having a girlfriend. actually i wouldn't care if his girlfriend was cool, but gwen is quite sub-par, and sadly he knows it. i just think it's depressing that he's staying with her anyway. but don't assume i'm not happy, because i am. i'm just stressed right now, and always forgetting how messy i am. i'm constantly afraid that it'll all slip away from me...the good grades, the decent body, the better than average social life. i just have all these responsibilities that i don't want to deal with right now. i guess i miss summer too. 2:26 pm - 2002-09-07 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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